Top Ten Signs You're Watching A Bad Mafia Movie

10. Takes place on the mean streets of Appleton, Wisconsin

9. The fake blood is clearly Yoo-Hoo

8. Someone is given an offer he has the option of refusing

7. Directed by Martin Scorsese...'s brother Larry

6. When mobsters try to dump body in Jersey, they sit in traffic at the tunnel for 90 minutes

5. Instead of horse's head, informant wakes up with a delicious chocolate on his pillow

4. Punishment for snitching: No X-Box for a week

3. Boss keeps using the catchphrase, "Don't Hassel the Hoff"

2. Feds use wiretap to get famous vegetarian lasagna recipe

1. Only whacking is done by Mark Foley