10.Hey, it's Conrad Murray. 14 years? I didn't get that for murder
9.This is your hairstylist. Make sure to condition after each delousing
8.Do you want the cell closer to the espresso machine or jacuzzi?
7.Congratulations, I hear you're going to Vail. Wait, nevermind
6.Hey, it's your cell mate. Do you like the top or bottom?
5.Sorry, I must have the wrong number. I was trying to reach Todd Blagojevich
4.Hey, it's Dave. Tonight's Top Ten List is about you. Nice work
3.It's 2011, why do you still have an answering machine?
2.This is President Obama. I'm granting you a full pardon. Nah, I'm just screwing with you
1.It's the warden. The inmates are asking how much you want for your seat
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Affliction!
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